Best 6: things to do in November edition.

This is my “me” night, meaning I have been deserted by my roommates for the majority of the evening – this usually results in me laying on the couch, eating freezer waffles, and singing “La Vie en Rose” to myself repeatedly. Tonight, though, I figured it would be good to at least try to write about something, at least something other than expressive realism or depressing novels from the 1920’s. So. I have decided to share with you some fun things to do during the second half of this lovely month of November, mostly based on what I did over the first half of the month.

1. Break your toe.

I know, it sounds difficult, but it’s really not! All you have to do is sit in a chair at a table and have some pent up frustration. Try to push the chair back with your feet, and really put a lot of energy into it – you will not achieve this through half-assery. Keep pushing until – voila – your foot loses traction on the carpet and, with surprising force, crashes into the table, making you want to scream in agony… that is when you know you’ve done well. Good job, you’ve probably broken the second toe on your right foot, just like me (I think). Twins.

2. Play mind games… with yourself!

This is astonishingly easy. My personal favorite game is “Convince Yourself That Turkey Burger You Just Made Is Giving You Food Poisoning.” You can actually make yourself feel pretty nauseous and anxious, even if you overcook the turkey burger. General paranoia is a helpful trait to have if you are interested in doing this, and if you are doing the turkey burger thing, don’t use a meat thermometer (I don’t even own one – one step ahead of the game). The uncertainty is what makes this really exciting.

3. Fall down in a public place.

Things you’ll need: TOMS (or other shoes with traction that is abysmal), rain, slippery floors, etc. I also find it helpful to not be paying any attention whatsoever to the outside world; it works best when your head is in the clouds. I mean, I guess this is pretty self-explanatory. Always makes for a good story, I can tell you that much.

And now I will offer some serious recommendations.

4. Make a November playlist.

I am a firm believer in having a playlist for every occasion, and the month of November is no exception. I just listen to songs and imagine myself sitting by a window, wrapped in a blanket, watching the rain harass those poor, naked tree branches. November is weird, because I associate it with both coziness and bitterly cold weather. My playlist probably reflects that.

The Quintessential Mid-November Hypothetical Mixtape.

The Quintessential Mid-November Hypothetical Mixtape.

5. Get addicted to a new show. 

It doesn’t have to be new to the world, but it should be new to you. I mean, what’s the point of winter if not to stay in and binge-watch Netflix, right? I’ve gotten into Lost lately, thanks to Olivia, who has watched the whole series like three times. It’s a good show, but most of you probably already know that so I’ll just shut up about it. We are also very much addicted to Say Yes to the Dress in this apartment, and I’ve tried to get everyone on my level of appreciation for Parks & Rec… not as popular. But nonetheless, try it. All five season on Netflix, SCORE.

I'll bet you're not as sophisticated as Tom.

I’ll bet you’re not as sophisticated as Tom.

6. Sleep.

It gets dark at 4:30 anyway, might as well use it as an excuse to get some shut-eye.

 

Well, this has been delightful. I hope everyone, from the NaNoWriMo enthusiasts to the participants in No Shave November, is having a great month!

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And now I know everything, part II.

Gwageous.

Gwageous.

Instead of whipping out my thesaurus app and delivering an extremely riveting opening paragraph, I am going to spare you and cut right to the chase today. But I wouldn’t recommend getting used to it.

In September, I started my freshman year of college – unsurprisingly, it was well-documented on this very blog. Just last week, I finished. I also promised a follow-up to the total outpouring of wisdom and brilliance that took place during my first week on campus. As would obviously be expected, I am a girl who keeps her promises. And with that, readers, I present to you the following bits of important knowledge acquired by yours truly over the course of the year:

  • That is probably not a breakfast burrito someone accidentally chucked into the laundry machine with their towels. Nope. It’s very likely vomit.
  • If you eat all carbs, you feel like all carbs.
  • Sometimes there are going to be cute boys who have jobs at places that require you to spend money on food. Like, you have to buy a NutriGrain bar in order to make two-second eye contact. All I can say is this: get ready to totally deplete your dining account.
  • Some shoes are suitable for walking on bricks in the rain. TOMS are certainly not included.
  • Christmas lights seriously make everything better.
  • Real breakfast food is a luxury; do not take it for granted.
  • Certain people never really learned how to do anything right, and they are the ones who set the fire alarm off at one in the morning.
  • Fire alarms no longer sound like fire alarms. They sound like air raid sirens, and they will scare the living daylights out of you.
  • I mumble in my sleep. Thought you should know.
  • Only about one in three assigned textbooks is actually necessary.
  • Jaywalking is reserved exclusively for cool people. If you don’t fit into that category, you’re probably going to have a very close encounter with a bus.
  • Effort to look nice + rain = UNCONTROLLABLE ANGER
  • Nicknames for people you don’t know but see all the time are not only necessary, but also inevitable.
  • Sit and read in all the beautiful places it is possible to do so.
  • Don’t even try that delicious-looking peanut butter cookie dipped in chocolate. Your life will be more bearable never knowing its glory.
  • Taking 8:30 classes should, frankly, be considered a form of self-harm.
  • Some people don’t hold doors. Deck ’em in the face.
  • Some people do hold doors. Kiss ’em on the face.
  • Cereal = breakfast, snack, and dessert.
  • Want proof of the innate human fear of interaction with strangers? Step into an elevator.
  • Other college students don’t enjoy the saccharine bounciness of ABBA as much as I do.
  • Even the most tedious cleaning jobs can be better than writing that ungodly 8-page paper.
  • Nothing beats topic overlap in different classes. Nothing.
  • Just get over yourself and sing in the shower. Give the neighbors a free concert.

With all of that said, I bid you adieu, mes petits choux (think that’ll stick? probably not). Have an amazing week!